Could This be the End of 'No Ordinary Moments'?

“Those who think they have not time for bodily exercise will sooner or later have to find time for illness."

 

- Lord Edward Stanley

The Paradigm Shift…

Today as I write this, it's Monday 5^th March, 2012.  A paradigm shift is happening and I know now what I need to do - what feels right for my life at this point in time. 

I’m just not sure yet where to begin.  This morning I’m suffering from overthinking.  An annoying tendency I have which rears its’ ugly head every so often.  So for me, the best way to stop overthinking and begin doing, is to put it into words and usually what happens during this process is that the pieces of the puzzle and all those thoughts floating and swimming around in my head, begin to make sense and I can then see some pattern, so that order begins to emerge.

Now I’m sounding like a broken record.  My blog is all about ‘health and fitness’, but my posts of the last six months, even though touching on this, haven’t been definitive in regard to specifics of my fitness journey, as they originally began nearly three years ago.  I have no further (fitness) insights to share with you, because I’ve reached the end of that particular road. 

I am about to embark on another slightly different road. Health and fitness is still part of that, but it becomes only one part of the equation.  Its’ importance hasn’t changed, however, but how I ‘do’ health and fitness has…is changing.  I can see clearly now how it is a part, no less important, of the bigger picture of life.

I remember the first shift.   I embarked on my Ideal Bodies Online journey back in July 2008…major shift.  I was not in a good place.  Going forward just a little to January 2009, life had changed for the better and I grabbed it with everything I had.  Doors opened and I had a new body; new confidence (my old self); increased health and fitness; new plans and limitless opportunity.  My learning curve grew exponentially and in that process I learned a lot about myself and what I was capable of.

In three-and-a-half years I’ve turned my life around.  I made a promise never to return to that period before July 2008, and I haven’t.  It hasn’t been all smooth sailing, but on the whole I’ve maintained around the same weight and I’ve definitely become fitter and stronger.  For me, it’s all about being better than I was yesterday, and I am proud to say that with each day, I’m getting better (well…not every day).  Some days of course you may take a step or two back, and some days you take a step or two forward.  I’m fortunate to say that there have been more days that I’ve gone forward than back, so I’m still out in front and making progress.

My accomplishments since embarking on my ‘Fit-and-Fab-at-40’ journey have been:

-          Losing around 15kgs to sit on a weight range of 58-60kgs to culminate just before my 40^th birthday with a 12% body fat on the day of my photo shoot in January 2009.

-          Joining the Australian Army in June 2009 at the age of 40.  I embarked on a 12 month training program written by Kristin Gleeson of IBO, to prepare me for the rigours of Basic Training, taking into account my back injury.

-          Helping others on their health and fitness journey as a personal mentor for IBO which I finished up in 2010.

-          Overcoming hip bursitis and being able to run again after approx. 5-8 years being unable to run.

-          Overcoming a herniated disc injury which had plagued me since 2000 (when I originally injured my back) through exercise and a lot of rehabilitation work.  Firstly through IBO and then specific rehabilitation, encompassing core strength and stability work with exercise physiologist, Liz Nelson.  The significance of this particular achievement is signficant, given the accompanying muscular and skeletal imbalances and injuries which I’ve sustained as complications of having a back injury.

-          Joining and training in Crossfit for 6 months of 2010.  This had been a goal of mine since becoming fitter and I saw this as an opportunity to ramp up my fitness.  However, I had to concede that Crossfit became detrimental to my fitness because of existing injuries and my underlying incorrect muscular activation issues.  I also discovered at this time that I had a bone spur and beginnings of hip degeneration in the RHS hip ball and socket.

-          Becoming educated as to what good nutrition is and what works best for me.  I have to admit the ‘what works best for me’ is still up for contention, and I’m at this very moment rethinking that part of nutrition.   Or moreso, taking this a step further.  A reason for me rethinking is tied up in the way I view or ‘do food’.  It’s something I’m constantly learning about and you could say that it’s evolved and still is evolving.  I will let you in on that when I feel more comfortable that I won’t be judged for it. The proof will be in the pudding, so to speak.  I would prefer to show you with results rather than with cheap talk.

The physical accomplishments are always easier to measure, but as we all know, it’s the other accomplishments that you can’t necessarily see by looking which have the most profound effect on our lives.

I’m talking mainly about the self confidence that comes from overcoming challenges.  This and the happiness and aura that you exude is exponential in its’ effect on not only your family and friends, but people you come into contact with daily.

It’s the clarity you get about your life and the hope and excitement you have about your future, because it’s so full of possibility.  Life then becomes exciting because you are no longer a bystander but a full participant - physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

It also becomes about focus…goal driven focus.  You become determined and persistent in your endeavours.

Back to paradigm shifts…and focus.

For three-and-a-half years I have been ‘on’. I flicked a switch back in July 2008 and my focus was like tunnel-vision.  I trained hard, six days a week and I followed my IBO program (I did four programs in a row) 100%!  Nothing could deter me from reaching my goals and the old Kerry was back!

For three-and-a-half years I’ve weighed not only myself on a daily basis (though I’m honest when I say it has never really done my head in too much.  I’ve looked at it as a way to monitor patterns rather than punish or reward myself) but I’ve weighed my food on and off.  I’ve tracked the calories consumed and the macro-nutrient break-up of my nutrition to ensure I’ve had the right balance of protein, fats and carbs.  I’ve tracked my BPM via HRM and calories expended in conjunction with calories consumed through nutrition via CalorieKing to ensure that I had a caloric deficit when my goal has been weight loss.  I’ve learnt bucket-loads in the process.

I’ve trained hard and I’ve trained intensely and even as recently as a couple of weeks ago my goal for 2012 was to train intensely and consistently for 12 months.  The same way and with the same intensity I have been for the majority of the three years.  For me, it’s been all or nothing. That is about to change.

Fellow health enthusiasts and bloggers…it’s time to turn that switch off and change the light bulb!

Paradigm shift…I’m fuckin’ tired!

I’m tired of being tired and overtraining (my fault entirely).   In the last month, all of a sudden I’m racking up small, niggly injuries.  Something is up.  At one stage only recently I couldn’t stomach the thought of rocking up to the gym.  Ummm… ***Danger! Danger! Proceed at your peril!***.  Is this a tap on the shoulder or what?  I’ve had enough of those to take notice.  If there’s anything I’ve learnt, it’s to listen to what my body and intuition is telling me, once I’ve ruled out the possibility that I’m just piking.

There are more dimensions to life than purely health and fitness, but

without those, there a fewer options….

Please understand - this isn’t about blaming anyone or even myself.  I think it’s a natural consequence and part of my health, fitness, and life journey.  It’s a kind of fork in the road.  A place where I stop and ask myself…”Do I continue along this path, or do I take another?”

I’m tired of having to weigh my food and myself. I’m tired of cooking separate meals for myself, my husband and my daughter and not being able to sit down at dinner all at the same time and enjoy dinners as a family.  I’m tired of thinking about cheat meals, free meals, low-carb, low-fat, blah..blah…blah! 

Of course, that’s not to say that if you’re beginning your weight loss journey that you don’t necessarily have to be doing those things.  Not forever anyway –just until you have your weight and nutrition under control and you’ve maintained for a good period of time.  I had to do it first to learn what I know now.  I’m just a lot further along the road, and the process no longer suits my purpose.  That’s it – nothing more or nothing less.

I’m not belittling what’s required at the start of an individuals’ journey.  I’m just taking the next step toward what I deem as progress.

I’m tired of the fact that my workouts take so much time out of my day that I don’t get to do other things in my life because it’s not just the workout, it’s the fallout – pissed off because I don’t have the energy to do what other things I want or need to do in my life on any given day. 

I think I’ve well and truly proven myself.  Not only to others, but to myself.  It’s time to stop trying to prove to myself what is apparent to everyone else.  I’m fit, muscular and lean.  No prizes here.  So why the hell am I still doing this?  As a perceptive friend said to me only recently…”You’re a fit 40yr old trying to train like a fit 20yr old”.  He was right.  It’s time to start thinking like a fit 40yr old and accept that life is different.  It’s suicidal for me to continue pursuing a 20yr old fitness mindset.  Even though at my core, I still feel like that 20yr old.  This is my second wind in life and I intend to make the most of it by working smarter and being kinder to myself.  I can still be fit, muscular and lean.  I don’t have to beat myself up to achieve that anymore.

Where this all began…

When I finished up with my martial arts club, back eons ago, I suspect I had a nervous breakdown of sorts.  I went on to make another business mistake (that made two in a row where I chose the wrong person I went into business with) and during the fallout of those gut-wrenching failures, I decided there and then while going away to lick my wounds, that life for me would be different.  I was not going to partake in the madness of the world around me any longer…working too hard, working to be ‘rich’ (what a joke that is), and having no time to do the simple things in life which in the end became less attainable and further from my grasp.  That was around the time I fell pregnant with Philomena.  She then became another catalyst for change.  Having children for most people, as with myself, changes your perspective about life and what becomes more important.

Anthony and I decided then that life would be different.

We made the specific choice that I would stay home full-time to rear Philomena while she was at school.  I sold my car and we bought a unit in Mt Warren Park, as that was all we could get into at the time.  I did it tough with a young baby, having no car most of the time and having to catch public transport.  When you have a car, you take for granted the simple little things, like going the shops to buy necessities whether it’s pouring rain, windy, cold or oppressively hot.   Luckily, we had Anthony’s parents and a good friend to help during those difficult early years.  Since then, we’ve managed to buy a house and hang onto our investments.  I consider ourselves doing okay even on one income.  It’s a little tougher at the moment financially, but life is good.   Having a little more income through the Army Reserves has helped. Going out to work full-time to get a bigger or better house for me was not an option and still isn’t if it can be helped.  I couldn’t even imagine the detrimental effect on family life with all that stress.  I know most of the population have to do this.  We just chose and still choose, different.

So we decided that our family was going to be different than the mainstream.  Life would be quiet and Philomena would not be indulged.  We would give her our love, time and a quiet, stress-free and peaceful home life.  We would raise her to make healthy food choices, to have manners and courtesy, respect others and act with dignity.  And most of all, we would tell her we loved her and that you are never too old for hugs.  And we still do.

We are practicing Catholics and decided that though we don’t speak out about it, we would live those ideals and bring up Philomena with them.  It is our moral compass in a world where the majority of people have no moral compass and many people are lost.  I believe that it’s those guiding principles and traditions that keep us on course and keep us strong as a family and unite us.  Sometimes what we celebrate is against popular belief and it can be difficult to explain to your child why we don’t always follow what others do.  As we often say to Philomena, “just because others do something, that doesn’t mean you have to do it too”.  It’s about what is the right thing to do for us, which isn’t always easy, especially for a nearly six year old girl.  But she’s doing fabulously and as long as we explain why we do what we do she’s content.  She won’t understand fully right now, but one day she will.

So, there are rules we’ve set.  We will never allow a play station or computer games in the house.  We will never allow a TV in every room.  We limit TV exposure and encourage a lot of outside play and exploration.  The evenings are time to reduce the noise, turn down the lights, read, converse as a family and have time for quiet contemplation and then go to bed peacefully. 

I think the majority of families have lost the ability to connect because they are too busy living their own individual lives attached to technology and drowned out by all the noise, under their own roof.  They are like boarders who come out occasionally because they’re hungry and go back to their individual lives, and as a consequence they don’t know their own family. They have the inability to connect with others as well as themselves, introspectively. This also includes the inability to recognise signs and signals and lifes' sometimes subtle vibrations that reach out to us.  Society is so de-sensitised that it takes the force of an oncoming train to wake us from our state of disconnectedness.

“The most important thing is to find out what is the most important thing.”

- Shunryu Suzuki

At this point in time it’s about simplifying life when the accepted norm is to complicate life.  It doesn’t have to be this difficult.  Life doesn’t have to be that busy or stressful.  As the saying goes…less is more.

Paradigm shift…less is more.  It doesn’t have to be this difficult. 

Since moving into our new home and connecting more with my surroundings, and endeavouring to connect with family and friends at a deeper level, I’ve found that I’m yearning for more simplicity in my life to gain a richer, more satisfying relationship with it.

It’s all about Balance.  And I realise I’ve said this before.  ‘Balance’ was used in the context of my health and fitness journey, but Balance now is all about life as a whole and how I integrate all parts of my life (and the different roles I play) to reflect this.  It’s about living life more intuitively based around of course, a healthy lifestyle.  That hasn’t changed.  I’m not about to throw the baby out with the bath water. 

However, in addition to that it’s about living a life that is more genuinely me.  Those feelings of uneasiness and that somehow what I was doing was no longer congruent with what I knew in my heart to be right for me, are what’s been surfacing in the last six months.  I just didn’t know it then.

I’ve been a gym-rat for three years.  I’ve worked out and eaten, following program after program.  It’s become too hard, too tiring and too regimented.   It’s time to approach my health and fitness lifestyle differently, and enjoy physical pursuits of old, before my martial arts days, as well as encounter new ones.   It’s time to breathe fresh air into my health and fitness lifestyle and as Peter Barr would say… to continue living (more of) my genius.

From here it’s about being ‘Fit-and-Fab-after-40’. It’s time to remove all that white noise where I take life a notch upward, but at a slower, more flowing and intuitive pace.

Could this be the end of ‘No Ordinary Moments’?...

I haven’t decided yet whether to finish ‘No Ordinary Moments’ with this post.  I don’t know.  Maybe it will just evolve as I have evolved.  In the big scheme of blogs in this world, mine is just a number of millions of blogs written by people who want to be heard.  I just don’t know if I need to be heard any longer.  Am I satisfied with living out my life without an audience?

To quote the famous Zen koan…”If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around, does it make a sound?”  If I cease to allow people to bear witness to my journey via blogging, will anybody feel the ripple when my blog ceases to exist?

2012...You Make Me Feel So....

“It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.”

― J.K.Rowling

Only 4 more days until 2012.

I can't believe how the year has gone so quickly.  Reviewing my goals from 2011, I find I achieved a few and some I didn't.  My goal of maintaining 57kgs (or within 1kg of) didn't go to plan, but I maintained that happy weight for 6 months of the year, so I was pretty happy with that.  I intend to hit that weight in January 2012 and again, try to maintain that weight all year round.

For me, 2012 will be a year of consolidation.  I won't be taking on anything new, fitness-wise.  I will be focusing on strength in the first half of the year and then power. 

It should filter through to my army fitness tests.  I did manage to reach my goal of 40 push-ups for my BFA.  I didn't make any real gains as far as my running for my BFA though, so I hope to next year .  If I get the consistency, I should see a marked improvement in my running time.

My plans for 2012 are not sexy but the results should be, provided I stick to training consistently and staying on top of my nutrition.

So it's going to be a rather boring year in 2012.  Nothing new really.  Just hard, consistent training and nutrition throughout the year and building a strong foundation and platform to see me through 2013. I've got a couple of big things happening in my life in 2013 in the way of big changes, so I want to make next year really count. 

Next year's training as well as one particular change in 2013, will lead me into what I've been working toward since my 40th birthday.  It's a 5 year plan and I'm already thinking about what I want and what will take place on my 45th birthday in 2014.

I'll be keeping it under wraps though, so I'm afraid you'll have to stay guessing for awhile.

Anyway...I've noticed a change in my posts for 2011.  Apart from the fact that I've hardly done much in the way of posts, I also haven't had anything really inspiring to say.  I think time for talking was well and truly over, and I've just been focusing on the doing.  I've also been pre-occupied on the domestic front and happy and contented getting quite involved in family and our new home, and making our home life just so peachy!  I love being at home, getting more involved with Philomena's activities; cooking; cleaning; gardening; family and friends; and generally pottering around the yard.  Miss Phil and I call it our 'Secret Place'.  That's for another post coming soon.

Well time to say adieu!  How did you go with your goals for 2011?  Do you have new ones planned for 2012, and do they Make You Feel So?  I hope they do, otherwise how will you see them come to fruition if your heart and soul doesn't feel them with utter conviction?

Oh...don't you just love my post pic?  Now that to me depicts sheer athleticism.  If I looked that good in a crop top and shorts then I'd die one happy girl.  Of course, I'm happy now. However, that would be the icing on the cake of my blessed life.

Nothing Profound to Say...

"Excellence is Not a Skill - it's an Attitude"

- source unknown

It's the end of October already.  My last post was at the start of October, and still I don't have alot to share with you.  It's not that there hasn't been anything happening much in my life.  Quite the contrary.  There is alot happening as per usual.  However I seemed to have lost interest in sharing my life via blogland.  I'm thinking it might be a phase I'm going through. 

I've discovered that I get alot more done in my life when I'm not blogging or continually on facebook.  I haven't been reading any blogs (my apologies if that offends you), and it's not that I'm not interested in anyone's life, it's just that I have so much going on.  And since moving into our new home, life is more labour intensive...bigger home, bigger yard, husband away alot - therefore more things to do with the same amount of time.

But you know, I'm quite enjoying it.  I'm achieving so much more.  I'm a person of action, and this allows me to 'act' rather than live precariously through other people's lives.  Not that, that is what I do.  But sometimes you can get so caught up in reading about other people's lives that you fail to live your own life.

I haven't much to say about my current fitness goals really.  Suffice to say that I'm back on track and 100% on plan for nutrition (apart from the weekend) and finally starting to see the scales move down.  Though it's been a struggle internally to make that decision.  I have about 3kgs to go still before I'm back to lean, but I'm happy right now in my life and more accepting of ups and downs.

I'm here for another week, and I'll be off for 3 weeks for the AR and I'll be back end of November.  I'm looking forward to it, though I hear that where I'm heading, there is no formal gym or PT sessions.  Just a running track.  So I will have to get creative and apart from running will have to put together some bodyweight exercises to keep me challenged.  And I should have enough free time to be able to train daily (fingers crossed).  So my goal is to come back 3kg's lighter. :)  Here's hoping.

Anyway...I thought I'd include a photo of Pauline Nordin just for the heck of it, and I like the quote.  I think it says alot.

I believe that excellence isn't something we need to necessarily shoot off at the mouth about.  It doesn't have to be glamourous or exciting.  It's something we should be living on a daily basis.

So that's a wrap up, and I'll hopefully post upon my return.  Though it's getting close to Christmas then...e-gads!  A lovely time of the year.   So many things to do upon my return, and you know the most exciting part of my life right now?  I can't wait to build my compost bays, raised vege garden and I'm hoping we may have a couple of (bantam) chickens at Christmas (for Philomena). Oh...and start the my native cottage garden design (waiting on my book to arrive).   Of course, when I get back.  Oh..and I also look forward to setting some new training goals.   So much to do...so little time! 

Have you Worn Your Superhero Costume Lately?

“Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it.

Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.”

- Johan Wolfgang von Goethe

Do you have a picture or an idea of what or who you would like to become or be?  A goal perhaps of something or someone you strive to emulate?  Or perhaps it's not so much that you want to be someone.  Maybe it's a level of achievement you would like to attain or reach.

I liken the striving to donning on my superhero costume.  It is perhaps my alias...my secret identity...my alter ego. 

It's the ideal of the person you hope to become.  When you change into that costume, or you acquire a certain item that perhaps that person...that role...that achievement... would have, you become that person.  You imagine how you would feel...act...look in that costume or with that item.

Your actions from then are always moving toward achieving that end.  Some may call it 'faking it til you make it'.  And you're faking it because in reality, you aren't quite (well...maybe you're not even close) living up to those superhero expectations. 

Well I'm here to tell you it's okay if you're faking it, and you're not even close to making it.
The most important thing is...you've made a start and you're putting in the action and you're striving to better yourself...your circumstances...your outcomes. 

When you set yourself a seemingly formidable goal, it seems when starting out that you may never get there.  It seems so difficult and you wonder whether you're kidding yourself that you'll ever reach it.  Especially when you've begun the journey and it's harder than what you envisaged.  It seems that you may never be worthy or ready to pull on that superhero costume you bought and it hangs in the wardrobe beckoning you to put it on - even if only fleetingly.

But I encourage you...I dare you to put it on!   Because unless you do, how do you know what you require of yourself and how do you know what real stuff you're made of if you never put it on?

And in the striving, as you reach each step and climb higher and closer toward your goal, there will be one day when you realise you're wearing that costume and it fits like a glove and you wonder what all the fuss was about, because now it's just a part of you.

But in order to realise that day, you had to persevere feeling like you were faking it, and overcome the fear of what others thought of you.  And you know...people will always remember who you are right now, not who you were necessarily. 

And anyway, what does it matter how others see you right now?  Is it not more important how you would see yourself?  Because you know that with time...with right action...one day and the next, others will see you, how you would see yourself. 

And who knows...you may then become their real life hero, because you dared to dream... you dared to try...you dared to put on your super hero costume and you showed others what is possible.

Delayed Gratification

"The ability to discipline yourself to delay gratification in the short term in order to enjoy greater rewards in the long term is the indispensable prerequisite for success."

- Maxwell Maltz

It's interesting to note the thoughts that run through your head when you're working out in the gym.  I find time in the gym is when I seem to work through stuff, and it's usually in-between sets.  I think exercise gives us the opportunity to tap into our bodies and gives us the ability to be introspective during such times of physical exertion and awareness.  Not just on a physical level, but also emotionally and mentally.

I think that's a big reason why I love training, and I've missed it big time being away for nearly two weeks.  I've been climbing the walls.  I can't remember the last time I was away that long.  This chest infection really hit me for six, and I still have an annoying cough that continues to persist in the evenings, during the night and early mornings.

Today was my first day back and I started with a cycle class.  I was feeling quite green to be honest, and what I would normally find easy was a bit of a struggle.  It was mainly the seedy feeling and my legs tired more quickly than normal, but I made sure that I finished and pushed myself when I could.   However, my weight session went well afterwards, and I started where I was the last session, and gauged how far to push myself.  I was happy with the outcome, completing everything and afterwards was rewarded with that wonderful feeling of energy and vitality that comes with a good training session!  Oh how I missed you Go Health (and I've never said that before)!

Tomorrow it's my early morning RPM class, which I've decided to do as a regular thing.  I realised that that this week I'll end up doing four cycle classes. Hah!  Who would of thought?  But I'm really enjoying them.  And it's one of the best classes where you really get more bang for your buck as far as a cardio workout.  It's helping me get these legs stronger where I need to...in my quads.

Anyway...delayed gratification.  Well you can see the photo.  It's a typical before and after transformation shot.  Typical in the way it's orchestrated.  That is...what someone looked like before and then what they looked like after some transformation program.  I don't know who this person is.  But I just love how athletic she looks!

That's what amazes me about body transformations.  You never know what's possible.  It always excites me to think that you can take your body from where it is right now to something which initially can seem impossible.  I think that's why the term 'body sculpting' is called that. 

It's like a sculptor starting off with a piece of clay that has no real definition.  He has a vision of what he wants that clay to look like and begins to mould it.  Once it's close to it's final shape, he can then begin to chip away, being more precise and giving definition to accentuate the areas which he wants to.  And so it is with our bodies.  We are the sculptors and the tools we use are not only the genre of exercise and training we choose, but also the food and nourishment we give it, and the volume and intensity of our training.  And lastly...the longer we chip away...the degree of precision of our work, the more which is revealed to show the masterpiece which is our artistic form.

Looking back at my photos I had done in January 2009, it's hard to believe I was 54.75kg's on the day of those photos, with depletion. Hard to believe, because at 57kg's, two years on, I actually look leaner, without any type of depletion.  That excites me, because what it tells me is that over time, my body can and will change if I persist. 

And that's what delayed gratification is.  It's holding a vision of what's possible and what you want to achieve and then doing what's necessary, even though at times it seems hard.  You want that thing, whatever it is, right now!  Once you make that decision you want to be healthier, stronger, fitter, leaner, more financially well off, etc, etc, you want all the things in the universe to give it to you now! 

Let's face it...the thought of not getting what you want right this moment and knowing you have to put in, be patient and trust that it will happen with the appropriate amount of action, before it actually becomes reality, is one of the toughest tests we have to go through.

It's a test of our willingness and determination to see things through.  It's a  test of our patience.  And most of all it's a test of how strong is the vision of what we want to achieve.

This blog is mainly about matters related to health and fitness, but this pertains to any worthwhile endeavour, and it was actually another area of my life where I've been practicing delayed gratification and I've reaped the rewards, that got me thinking of the post title today. 

I'm sure we've all practiced it (delayed gratifcation), and what I find is that the pain of the delay is all but forgotten when you experience success.  All you have to do is rinse and repeat.

Bringing Dreams into Reality...

“Your life is the sum result of all the choices you make, both consciously and unconsciously. If you can control the process of choosing, you can take control of all aspects of your life. You can find the freedom that comes from being in charge of yourself.”

- Robert F. Bennett

Thanks to Katherine for the inspiration for today's post, titled 'Life is the Sum of all of our Choices'.

I really love the quote above by Robert Bennett, but I think it lacks something obvious that Katherine alludes to in her post.  And that is...even though we makes choices consciously or unconsciously, it's when we exercise those choices, that it is when truly influence the outcome of lives. 

something of the feel of my dream home

If you don't know by now, you may have guessed I'm somewhat of a dreamer.  I have been for all my life.  My dreams and visions of what I want to create fuel my desire and my zest for life.  I only wish there was more time to do everything I would like in this life time.  There is so much to learn and so much to create still, in the way of experiences.

photo courtesy of 1000 Homes of Happiness

As I get older, life is becoming more about the experiential and less about materialistic pursuits.  It's about cramming in as much of life as possible, yet living it with a sense of balance, authenticity and gratitude.  I want to soak up every miniscule moment of the gift of life and part of that is sharing it with those we love.



creating and experiencing wonderfully enriching moments with my children and family are a part of my dreams of a life fulfilled

Yet, even though I've always been a big dreamer, I'm grateful for the gift of action. 

You see...it's all well and good to think about all the choices that are on offer.  But we can delude ourselves into thinking that just by pondering over and filling our head with all the available choices and talking about what we want to do, equates to getting things done.

Bodily aspirations - part of the motivation to exercise and make good nutritional choices on a consistent basis

It's when, after making good choices, we then exercise those choices, by putting them into action and seeing them come to fruition.  Only then, can our dreams become a reality.

So are you making good choices and exercising them...now?   Not tomorrow, not next week, but right now.  Because the choices you exercise today will determine whether your dreams become reality. 

And in finishing, I must share with you something integral in going for your dreams.  It's a great quote by Commando Steve on his FB page today.  You know when you've made good choices, by the person you've become along the way.

"The highest reward for a man's toil is not what he gets for it, but what he becomes by it."

- John Ruskin



Square Your Shit Away...

"Listen to your life. See it for the fathomless mystery that it is. In the boredom and pain of it no less than in the excitement and gladness: touch, taste, smell your way to the holy and hidden heart of it because in the last analysis all moments are key moments, and life itself is grace."

~ Frederick Buechner

Thanks to Crystal for this photo

Do you get days where life is just so full of promise and you're feeling heady just thinking about all the wonderful plans you have in your life right now?  And that life becomes a little overwhelming?

Sometimes the action part of your life gets so frenetic that you want to put the brakes on, just so you can get your head around the momentum you've created and actually enjoy the results of it. Can anyone relate?

It only becomes a problem when the action you're creating is stuff that isn't necessarily getting you any closer to anything.  In fact...you could say that the action you're indulging in, isn't getting you immediate results.  But you could still count it as a necessary evil.

In the 'living' and 'action' realm of your life, there's always going to be some roadside carnage, and for me it usually affects my domestic roles, or anything else that isn't health and fitness related.

I've been living in that realm for...oh...about two weeks now...since the start of the school holidays.  It's been nice having a change to my usual routine of school drop-off-gym-school pick-up.  But as much as I've enjoyed the change where routine has gone out the window and I've got to spend some nice 'girly' time with Miss Phil, plus a seemingly endless list of birthday parties and socialising, I've reached the end of my tolerance for non-routine. 

I haven't seen inside the gym for a whole week (have been sick) and it's time to get everything back into some time of order.  It's time to resume my ordered way of life, and I am sooooo keen to get back to 'school drop off - gym - school pick-up' routine.

There's some unfinished business (tax...domestic duties...gardening) too, that needs to get sorted this week, so that once the action phase starts again, I'm not weighed down thinking about superflous stuff that just interferes with my training goals.  It's so easy to get caught up in that, and in the long run doesn't get you any closer to your goals and can sabotage any type of consistency.

Next year for me is going to be a very big year and I'm going to have to be really super-organised and economical in the way I do life.  I'll be embarking on full-time study and some other plans in the pipeline, so the way I train will have to change if I want to maintain the gains I've made, but still move towards making progress.  I know it's possible.  But I will need a different mindset to accomplish this.

So for the remainder of this year I will be concencentrating on deleting the superfluous from my life (that I haven't already jetisoned) and fine-tuning in the areas of training, nutrition and generally getting my home life in order.  It's only 5 months until the end of the year, so I want to squeeze in as much training as I can so I can see some real change in my body, before I embark upon life changes in 2012.

Also, I have a feeling, based on the weather we've had, that this summer will be an awesome one!  And I want to be ready to hit the beach on a regular basis and make the most of what would have to be my favourite part of the year...sun, surf, sand, and fresh air!  Summer of 2011 - here I come!



The Law of Exposure...



couch potato cat



 “The idea that addiction is somehow a psychological illness is, I think, totally ridiculous. It's as psychological as malaria. It's a matter of exposure. People, generally speaking, will take any intoxicant or any drug that gives them a pleasant effect if it is available to them.”

- William S. Burroughs

I don't know about you, but if I'm away from the gym any more than a couple of days, I can quite easily slip into the life of a couch potato. After three or more days of no gym or any type of movement or exercise, I feel like I'm stuck in quick sand, being pulled into my previous life of eating crap, sleeping more, and feeling more tired and listless. My belly starts to make strange noises; my body begins to emit some seriously funky odours, and feel sluggish and crappy. 

And did I mention that it's also a psychological and motivational killer?!

I know that this can be dangerous to my mental health (and eventually my physical health), if I keep exposing myself to the life of a couch potato.

 "The Law of Exposure states, what you expose yourself to dramatically shapes how you think, feel and act. Applying the Law of Exposure proactively takes deliberate action daily. It is a moment to moment conscious choice. If what you expose yourself to is not a reflection of that which you want to create more of in your life than you are going to be working against yourself."

Let's Get It Started...



"Everybody, everybody, let's get into it.

Get stupid.

Get it started, get it started, get it started.

Let's get it started (ha), let's get it started in here.

Let's get it started (ha), let's get it started in here.

Let's get it started (ha), let's get it started in here.

Let's get it started (ha), let's get it started in here.

Yeah."

- from the lyrics 'Let's Get It Started', by Black Eyed Peas

There's not much to say lately. Sometimes I think what I have to say is inconsequential to most. What goes through my head on most days in relation to my goals, is boring in its' simplicity.

It's what motivates me and gets me out of bed and wanting to train.  Shallow and self-serving it may appear, but it's what drives me.  The vision of what is possible gives me energy and inspires me to push myself, even when on some days I'd quite happily stay in bed under the covers.

But it's not in the reaching, but the striving where all the rewards are.  It's what keeps me young.

I feel a sense of accomplishment that at the age of 42, I'm in better shape than I was at 22, abeit not as agile. I'm in the best place of my life right now, and I figure it can only get better.  Why stop now?  I have no health problems or concerns because I exercise and I'm careful about what I eat, and I have a balanced approach to life.  I'm disciplined, but not obsessive.  

Let's be honest...to be lean all year round takes constant hard work and discipline.   It doesn't just happen by accident.  And to keep on top of our health and fitness takes so much more work, as all of us woman in their late 30's-over 40's can attest to.  I've also found from experience that we tend to have more 'stuff' to deal with...injuries, post-pregnancy scars (for those of us who have children) and the emotional baggage which comes as a natural consequence of just being around for this long.

 

"Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do"

- John Wooden



So what inspires me every day to train hard and watch what I eat?

A tight, hard set of glutes and

flaring quads...

That is all.  Nothing more...nothing less.

Oh...and to look like what Ava Cowan does in those shorts!  And without shorts. ;)  Come on, you know you want it too.  So...let's get it started...no time like the present (I tell myself).



On Failing...

"We often think people who achieve great things never fail, that success comes naturallly to them.  This, of course, is a mistake.  Truth is that risk-taking breeds failure and failure breeds success."

- from the book,'Run', by Dean Karnazes

If you haven't read any of Dean Karnazes books (aka 'Ultramarathon Man'), I'd encourage you to do so.  His books were recommended to me by someone I met a couple of months ago - Rose, who is a marathon runner.

Regardless of whether you like to run or not, this guy is an inspiration.  He's your Lance Armstrong of ultra marathon running.  Just to give you an idea of how freakish this guy is, here's a small excerpt from an article by Wired Magazine.  To read the complete article, just click on the link.

"Dean Karnazes ran 50 marathons in 50 days. He does 200 miles just for fun. He'll race in 120-degree heat..."

Now when I said he's an inspiration, that doesn't mean I'm about to go out and run an ultra marathon, let alone a marathon (marathons are running races of 42.5kms, or 42.195kms to be exact).  Maybe if I would have discovered these pursuits about 20 years ago, I think I would definitely have given them a go. 

But I can learn what humans are capable of and what is possible when it comes to human endurance.  And in doing so, I can evaluate my own performance and question my willingness to give everything in life, the very best of myself.

I think we can always do better than what we're presently doing.  There's no question about that.  The question is...are we willing to do better than what we're doing right now?   And is what we're doing, really our best?

I ask you this question, because I have been asking myself the very same thing.  Why?  It's not only in reading inspirational books, but in learning about people who are in your life right now, who in their ordinary, every day living, lead lives of quiet inspiration.  By quiet inspiration, I mean that you may not have known how inspirational their lives are or were, because they don't share them openly and are so humbling and modest, you may not even notice their presence.

It has been in the last couple of days that I learnt of someone who I didn't know too well, who was a friend of my husband's family. He recently passed away and in his eulogy I came to know of this remarkable man, whom I had met in our local church.  He was a regular attendee, but we never really spoke alot, apart from a small hello or goodbye.

To say that I was astonished at what he had achieved in his life, and the remarkable influence he had on his family, friends and peers was nothing short of momentum changing.

Since then, I've been questioning my own motivation and the fact that I've become so protective of being hurt, both physically and emotionally, that I think I've short-changed myself in what life has to offer and in what I can give of myself. 

Now don't get me wrong, I'm not admonishing myself for what I may or may not have done so far in my life.  But I can see that I haven't quite stepped up to the plate of late.  And it's because I haven't been ready to.  I've been afraid of failing.  And in being afraid of failing, I've pulled back on giving everything I have, in the aim of protecting myself.  Always weighing up every conceivable angle before proceeding, and not trusting in my ability to land on my feet.  Worried about how I would appear to others.  When you're constantly told how strong and confident you are, you worry about appearing anything but.  

Because, when all is said and done, of those things I have feared the most and attempted, I've survived and come through the other side. I have always landed on my feet, and when I looked back at why I was so worried, I realise that the fear lasted only a short while, but the feeling and exhilaration of overcoming, lingers indefinitely. 

In the last 2-3 years I've looked back at what I've achieved, and I have to say that I was scared alot of the time because I stepped outside my comfort zone more than I really wanted to.  Forcing myself to do things that I wasn't confident with, is something I've been doing to take my life to the next level.  I know that if I want to really experience everything that life has to offer, I have to take that leap of faith.

I've discovered in the last six months that some of the things I'd been afraid of, but have pushed myself to do, even though I hated doing it at the time, I no longer fear to the same extent.  It doesn't necessarily mean I'm great at them, but it does mean that I can now use that energy I had previously utilised being afraid, to channel into making progress and putting myself wholeheartedly into it. 

I'm now in  position to push myself to see what I'm really capable of and what I can achieve, now that I have a better handle on the fear factor.  There is still that element of fear, but it's not paralysing anymore because I'm not afraid of failing.  Because in the end, I know that if I give it 110% and give it everything I have, even if I stumble and fall and have seemingly failed, I've won the battle with myself. 

I don't know about you, but to me, succeeding in life isn't about beating others, but on winning the war with, and within yourself.

So how are you doing?  Is fear of failure stopping you from gaining the most from your life?    Because if so, I hope you can find the strength within you to embrace failing, so that you may experience the success you deserve!