Wk 29...Growing into My Own Skin

Well I just snuck in on Wk 29, which officially ends today. I've been extremely busy with our 25 year high school reunion, being the main organiser. It's been 18months in the making, and the big night arrives on 4th September. Without my two helpers, it would have been impossible to pull this off and have the numbers we expect on the night. With 235 students in our grade 12 year of 1985, it's been a mammoth task trying to find people. Even with the numbers we have, there have been so many we haven't been able to get in contact with.

There's alot of excitement in the air, and people are really looking forward to the night. I think after 25 years and reaching our 40's, there's a different feeling toward what a reunion means to people. Most have reached a stage where they're feeling comfortable with what they've done in their lives - good and not-so-good, and who they are. There's a certain level of maturity and confidence that comes with getting to this stage. And I think that's why we're more willing to share our lives now.

You reach an understanding that whoever you were 25 years ago, is most probably not going to be that person now, and that whatever happened back in high school was just a part our lives and people have moved on....people have changed. We are now more accepting of who we are at this point in time, and also more accepting of others, because we've all been on a journey.

Of course, there a still those who may have not moved on, or aren't inspired to 'reconnect', for want of a better word. And you know, that's okay. We all may be on a journey, but we're all at different stages. It's comforting to know that I feel okay with this...with wherever it is you are...they are...I am.

So my apologies if I haven't read your blog lately, but there are more pressing things happening at the moment. In fact, there are too many pressing things. So it's time to reassess my life and schedule. I intend to drop some things and open up more of my time to spend where it's more important to me. After the reunion is finished, it will probably be a great time for some renewal of soughts. I want to do less, but do better at doing less - if you know what I mean.

This year has been a totally different year to last year in more ways than one. As far as my fitness and fat loss, well it's not the entire focus of my life as it was last year. I've reached some goals and milestones as part of that focus, and I'm now living those goals and dreams that I worked so hard for.

I am now in the Army Reserves, and for the first time in 13 months, I am finally starting to relax, go with the flow and am beginning to enjoy it. Now I'm really starting to enjoy being a 'digger, and 'blowing shit up!'...lol...

I have kept off the weight and been able to maintain a satsifactory level of fitness, as well as my nutrition for the majority of the time. Still not as fit as I'd like, but given the circumstances, I'm happy with where I'm at. And I'm back in the (commercial) gym, although not as consistently or as much as last year. Best of all, I'm finally starting to make some real long-term progress with my muscular imbalances and hip/pelvis strength and stability. It's slow, but it will be better for me in the long term.

I'm a personal success mentor for Ideal Bodies Online, and I really enjoy it. It keeps me on track and reminds me of where I've been and come from.

I've started back at martial arts...albeit the fact my training is still a little sporadic. More on that later in this post.

I'm chairperson for our unit complex body corporate committee, as well as treasurer/secretary for another body corporate committee.

And of course, I'm doing the most important job in the world...being a mother and a wife! And without all my other roles and interests, I don't think I'd be the role model for my little girl that I would like. However...sometimes being something to everyone else is not always the most beneficial to all concerned, especially my daughter and husband, and of course me.So with all these changes, my gym training and nutrition hasn't been the sole focus of my life. I mean, really, it can't be if you want to enjoy longevity and balance in your life.

I'm quite comfortable now and growing into my own skin, more and more as I rediscover who I am in this life. That's what I love about reaching this age and stage of life. I haven't got everything down-pat 100% of the time, but I'm okay with that.

The key I think, is being contented without becoming complacent!

This year I've been down a couple of paths I thought I wanted to go down. But I discovered different. Sometimes what you think you want isn't always conducive to who you are. That's the discovery I made going down the Crossfit path. Yep...a big AHA period for me - Crossfit is not for me! I originally thought if I couldn't do Crossfit, it meant I had failed, because I knew inherently that to be the fittest I wanted to be, doing Crossfit was it. Of course, this is warped thinking, and I've been down this path before - thinking that one thing or one way was the 'only' way to be the best.

Surprised???

With my imbalances and injury (hip) I realised that I wasn't going to get any stronger doing Crossfit. I wasn't making any gains. In fact, I was sliding backwards. I needed the time and control to focus on using my muscles correctly, which Crossfit couldn't realisticly afford me. I was so exhausted, I couldn't function properly or at my best in other areas of my life, i.e. Army and Martial Arts.

The reality dawned on me...it was Crossfit OR Army and Martial Arts. I couldn't do it...my body couldn't do it all.

So now, I'll be focusing on my health and fitness goals which are conducive to 'doing me'. Martial arts still is my passion. But to do it well, you need to invest time into skill development. Also with the Army, it can be very physically demanding and requires strength and endurance. So weights/resistance training will always be part of my life. I just need to train smarter, by looking at my life and what I want to do, and devise a program and schedule which supports those things and supports me excelling in those areas. All the while, being aware that physio/rehabilitation is part of my training if I want to make real and lasting progress.

My weight last week came in at 61.4kg after an Army 'carbed-up' weekend, despite the fact it was a very physical weekend. I'm still aiming for the 57kg mark, but to get there by 4th September is not looking good.

I'm not panicking. I'm still looking fairly lean compared to the majority, though I'm thinking how soft and fat I'm looking. Of course, I'm always comparing myself to my photoshoot where I was a lean 54.75kg, which is not a realistic weight for me. So I'm still carrying around 4-5kg's of bodyfat, and it's all on my hips, stomach and thighs (mostly)...yada...yada...yada..

But I'm okay with that. 4th September is a good goal and I think I could easily drop those kilo's. I might even do a mini-depletion. Okay...haven't I just yacked on? Time to go...

Oh...found a dress for the reunion, but I'm not telling! All I'm going to say is that I love the back! ;)