On Failing...

"We often think people who achieve great things never fail, that success comes naturallly to them.  This, of course, is a mistake.  Truth is that risk-taking breeds failure and failure breeds success."

- from the book,'Run', by Dean Karnazes

If you haven't read any of Dean Karnazes books (aka 'Ultramarathon Man'), I'd encourage you to do so.  His books were recommended to me by someone I met a couple of months ago - Rose, who is a marathon runner.

Regardless of whether you like to run or not, this guy is an inspiration.  He's your Lance Armstrong of ultra marathon running.  Just to give you an idea of how freakish this guy is, here's a small excerpt from an article by Wired Magazine.  To read the complete article, just click on the link.

"Dean Karnazes ran 50 marathons in 50 days. He does 200 miles just for fun. He'll race in 120-degree heat..."

Now when I said he's an inspiration, that doesn't mean I'm about to go out and run an ultra marathon, let alone a marathon (marathons are running races of 42.5kms, or 42.195kms to be exact).  Maybe if I would have discovered these pursuits about 20 years ago, I think I would definitely have given them a go. 

But I can learn what humans are capable of and what is possible when it comes to human endurance.  And in doing so, I can evaluate my own performance and question my willingness to give everything in life, the very best of myself.

I think we can always do better than what we're presently doing.  There's no question about that.  The question is...are we willing to do better than what we're doing right now?   And is what we're doing, really our best?

I ask you this question, because I have been asking myself the very same thing.  Why?  It's not only in reading inspirational books, but in learning about people who are in your life right now, who in their ordinary, every day living, lead lives of quiet inspiration.  By quiet inspiration, I mean that you may not have known how inspirational their lives are or were, because they don't share them openly and are so humbling and modest, you may not even notice their presence.

It has been in the last couple of days that I learnt of someone who I didn't know too well, who was a friend of my husband's family. He recently passed away and in his eulogy I came to know of this remarkable man, whom I had met in our local church.  He was a regular attendee, but we never really spoke alot, apart from a small hello or goodbye.

To say that I was astonished at what he had achieved in his life, and the remarkable influence he had on his family, friends and peers was nothing short of momentum changing.

Since then, I've been questioning my own motivation and the fact that I've become so protective of being hurt, both physically and emotionally, that I think I've short-changed myself in what life has to offer and in what I can give of myself. 

Now don't get me wrong, I'm not admonishing myself for what I may or may not have done so far in my life.  But I can see that I haven't quite stepped up to the plate of late.  And it's because I haven't been ready to.  I've been afraid of failing.  And in being afraid of failing, I've pulled back on giving everything I have, in the aim of protecting myself.  Always weighing up every conceivable angle before proceeding, and not trusting in my ability to land on my feet.  Worried about how I would appear to others.  When you're constantly told how strong and confident you are, you worry about appearing anything but.  

Because, when all is said and done, of those things I have feared the most and attempted, I've survived and come through the other side. I have always landed on my feet, and when I looked back at why I was so worried, I realise that the fear lasted only a short while, but the feeling and exhilaration of overcoming, lingers indefinitely. 

In the last 2-3 years I've looked back at what I've achieved, and I have to say that I was scared alot of the time because I stepped outside my comfort zone more than I really wanted to.  Forcing myself to do things that I wasn't confident with, is something I've been doing to take my life to the next level.  I know that if I want to really experience everything that life has to offer, I have to take that leap of faith.

I've discovered in the last six months that some of the things I'd been afraid of, but have pushed myself to do, even though I hated doing it at the time, I no longer fear to the same extent.  It doesn't necessarily mean I'm great at them, but it does mean that I can now use that energy I had previously utilised being afraid, to channel into making progress and putting myself wholeheartedly into it. 

I'm now in  position to push myself to see what I'm really capable of and what I can achieve, now that I have a better handle on the fear factor.  There is still that element of fear, but it's not paralysing anymore because I'm not afraid of failing.  Because in the end, I know that if I give it 110% and give it everything I have, even if I stumble and fall and have seemingly failed, I've won the battle with myself. 

I don't know about you, but to me, succeeding in life isn't about beating others, but on winning the war with, and within yourself.

So how are you doing?  Is fear of failure stopping you from gaining the most from your life?    Because if so, I hope you can find the strength within you to embrace failing, so that you may experience the success you deserve!