Thursday, October 30

Gym Soapies (Girls only)

You know...I can't think of any soapies that revolve around 'life in the gym'. I'm not just talking about what happens between the staff, but what happens between the staff and members, and members and other members. And I'd love to know what other people are thinking in the gym! How cool would that be? A bit like that movie with Mel Gibson...What Women Want.

The reason I wonder is because I know all the stuff that goes through my head - if people only knew they'd think I'm insane. I mean, I'm so focused at the gym. I'm also courteous and polite. If anyone smiles or says hallo - I smile back. But on the whole, I look like I shut everything out and I am a little intense. I mean, I concentrate on what I'm doing. That's why I get results. But there is such a thing as 'peripheral vision' and 'peripheral hearing', and it's something I'm very good at.

Firstly'll know what I mean when I say...eye candy. Hell, plenty of that on offer! I mean, you can't help but look can you? Even if it's a quick, shifty, side glance to get an overall impression, and then just a few more quick shots to really assess the best bits, and lastly... filling up with more of the good stuff I damn...heh...heh...

And then there comes the critiquing...hmmm...nice butt...great upper body but shame about the chicken legs (do some squats why don't you)...biceps like boulders, perfect pecs, and a ....what the hell? ...beergut? ah..ah..not a good look!

Oh! And what about males stroking eachother's egos. You the cool (so they think), secret, rappy, handshakes and the "how's it goin' bro?"..."how dem delts doin bro?"..."dats nuttin - f***in hit me in the f***in guts man. It ain't gonna hurt". Too many a dose rap music clips me thinks...LOL...
And talking about rap music...those I-Tune clips should be classified 'x-rated', or at least 'soft porn'. I've never seen so many near-naked, black, booty gyrating women being ogled by black, rappy, illiterate (with songs like Dance Wiv Me, is it any wonder), sex-starved, chest-pounding males. Don't get me wrong, I love the music - gets me pumped during my workouts - let me tell ya! Oh well...who said I was looking for intelligence...I'm just looking.

OMG...I hate to think what men are saying about the women. Especially the ones with the big t**s and tight clothes, swaggering their little behinds. It's funny watching the men...their heads moving and following the swagger. Reminds me of those circus sideshow clowns that move their heads like the mexican wave, with their gobs open. least women are a little more discreet.

And then there's the women's gym fashions, or should I faux to speak...I can't get over some of the women with the tight, tight, little tops and bike pants, sporting those 'overhangs' and wearing highly visible lingerie bras that are meant for 'seduction' not 'sport', with their t***s saying "how do you do?". Or they bend over, with their g-strings playing the same tune.

Lastly...there's the aromas..."mmmm...he smells so good I could I eat him"..."she's wearing Dove tanning glow" ( I know cause I wear it and it smells good)..."he's wearing Lynx"..."he's wearing Hugo Boss (I know cause my hubby wears it), and I want to stick my nose in his chest and soak him up!"..."she smells like coconuts". And I don't want to talk about the unpleasant smells...we won't go there. Too nasty...enough to make me heave!

Well lucky for me, we don't know what people are thinking at the gym. Hmmm...I've had a few fantasies myself and it's nothing I would disclose...but...maybe I could become a 'Mills and Boons' novelist (or a porn film director...ha...ha...ha!).

Ciao for now...Kerry :)

Saturday, October 25

Sharpening the Saw

"Sometimes when I consider what tremendous consequences come from little things...
I am tempted to think...there are no little things." Bruce Barton

It's been brewing for days (my thoughts and feelings). You've probably heard that expresssion, 'sharpening the saw'. I use it often and have ever since reading Stephen Covey's book, 'The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People'. It's one of those books you never throw away and I come back to it time and time again. Though I have to admit it's been a little while since I've read it. I usually read it when I'm in 'business person' mode or role, which hasn't been for awhile.

If you haven't read his book, 'Sharpening the Saw' basically means taking time out to put perspective back into your life. To look at all areas of your life...physical, mental, spiritual and social (as Stephen puts it) and re-assess where you are at in all these areas. Making sure there is balance in all four areas of your life...Balance being the key word.

It's difficult to do as we seem to get more busy as we get older. I think generally I'm going in the opposite direction. For me, less busy is better. Simple is better. Less is more. It's taken me many years and deliberate planning to get to this stage. It doesn't happen by chance. You have to plan it that way.

If my life starts to get a little crazy, the warning bells sound in my head..."Kerry...slow down...think...where are you going...what are you're doing too much...cut back...simplify". Because I've been there - done that...stressed, too busy, working too hard and too long. Life was crazy for a long time. Crazy is not good. Running around like a chook with your head cut off is not''s...INSANE!

In order to have a simpler life I've had to forgo some things and let go of things. In some ways it's harder. But in the long run it actually makes life more enjoyable, because I have the time to observe; to be involved; to do things better; to think and ponder about life; to appreciate the finer moments and savour everything that life has to offer. I have the luxury of thinking about things on a deeper level...and it's something I like to do (think). Life is so interesting...people are so interesting and how their lives twist and turn is all so fascinating.

But in order to have the time to do this, you have to make the time and plan your life accordingly. I could lead you into believing that I have 'Pollyanna Syndrome'. I wish it were true and some days...yes...I am a bit of a Pollyanna, but least I'm happy. And the longer I'm on this earth, the less I care if other people don't share my enthusiasm and zest for life. Hell...that's their problem, not mine. Get a life damn it (and make it a good one)!

Anyway...digressing again...what the hell am I going on about? Balance...Why? Because at the moment my quiet, simple, less is balanced being jeopardised. My 'physical' life is starting to unbalance other areas of my life.

Yes...I am talking about doing the IBO program, because initially it takes time to change your lifestyle...your exercise (or no exercise) and dietary habits. But honestly...I don't have to think about that anymore. I know my nutrition plan back to front. I don't have to consult my plan anymore. And I'm in the routine of going to the gym. Hail, rain or shine...I'm there.

How do I say this?...doing this program has changed me. It's like opening Pandora's box. The genie is out of the bottle. It's like opening the door to my past. And my past was majorly 'physical'. What I mean by physical, is 'physical activity'. That was my life prior to having a child and husband. If I wasn't working, I was training, or involved in some way with something physically active.

Now I can't stop thinking and planning all the things I'm going to be doing again...martial arts, bushwalking, army reserves and more. But...where do I fit it all in? I can only do so much with raising a child and taking care of my husband's needs as well. My life in the last few years has been about Philomena and Anthony, and now that I have re-connected with my identity again...the new me has grown into a monster!'s all about me again! Get out of the way...Kerry is back and she's taking no prisoners! the saw (sounds like a horror movie I've been watching lately)....Balance Kerry...get it with the flow...Compromise.

Hmmm...compromise...Rachael you've done it again girl. How do you know the right things to say?

Okay...time to go...need to sharpen the saw a bit more I think and put the genie on a short leash!

Ciao for now...Kerry :)

P.S. Yes...I'm not right in the head...

Friday, October 24

Before & After Pics - First 12 Weeks

My First 12 Week Before & After Photos

Damn it...Rachael and Fifi have definitely upped the anti...I think I will have to post my photos. Oh how I hate my befores! You are told to look as bad as you can. Well...I had just got out of bed, so no shower, bed hair and horrible underwear! And you're only gonna see my 'front' okay? Arghhhhh...
I'm aiming for BUFF for my next 12 weeks along with doing 'Depletion Week' and getting professional photos done.
Ciao for now...Kerry :)

Training Program - 28/7/08 - 19/10/08

Click on images to enlarge

I was checking out Fifi's blog, and thought...what a great idea...a training journal. So I'm going to document my training program and my nutrition plans. My first program went pretty damn good...a near perfect 12 weeks!


I've posted my excel spreadsheets on what my training program looked like over the first 12 weeks.

This post is in progress as I work out how to put these images on. The spreadsheets are the originals of what I planned without changes to my schedule along the way. I think it'll be easier to make a notation of the changes, rather than go back and re-do the spreadsheets (too much work!).

Changes to Schedule...

1. Week 4...18/8-24/8...changed my rest day around to Friday
2. Week 7...8/9-14/9.....changed my rest day around to Thursday
3. Week 12...13/10-19/10...had 2 rest days...Thursday & Sunday

After going back through, I just realised that I only had one week where I had 2 rest days, and maintained a 6 day training week the first 11 weeks. Quite chuffed!
*N.B. Powerwalks consisted mainly of 'Treadclimber', which is like walking on sand. If I couldn't get onto the machine, then I mixed it up with combinations of 'Treadclimber', bike, and cross-trainer for 60 minutes.
Nutrition Program
Basically, my nutrition program is similar to other IBO members. It's just changed to accommodate different body types, fat loss/goals and workload. Mine consisted of 5 portion-sized meals a day, spaced 3 hours apart. Protein consumed at every meal, and for me, no carbs after meal 3. I had 2 x Free Choice Meals. One in Week 6 (wedding), and one in week 12 (INBA titles), which was my last week.
Ciao for now...Kerry :)
* Stay tuned for my next 12 week program schedule (at least the first 6 weeks anyway)...

Monday, October 20

My First 12 Week Journey is now complete...

Yes...yesterday was officially the end of my 12 week IBO (ideal bodies online) program! Yay!

What a roller-coaster of emotions...mainly highs...what a buzz! I have to admit, last week was probably the toughest one for me mentally, knowing that it was the last week and looking forward to a week off program. But I pushed through, and I was happy with my results! My total weight loss came to 8.8kg (I'm now 62.8kg); body fat loss of 7.6% (body fat is now 22.7%); and total cm's lost was 39cm (mostly off hips, waist).

I think myself very fortunate indeed, because I basically had a near-perfect 12 weeks! No sickness, no major injury setbacks, full of energy, and maintaining a 6 day p/w training program. I think I did have 2 weeks where I took 2 days because I put my neck out, and one in my last week because I had a body corp meeting, and being the chairperson, I kinda thought I should make an appearance. So I was rather happy with my whole 12 weeks...I was so pumped!

This week is definitely an R&R week! I put my neck out again on Sunday morning. What a terrible night's sleep after a great day on Saturday evening with the girls from IBO at the INBA titles. Philomena wasn't well, and I ended up lying next to her most of the night, with hardly a wink of sleep. Getting out of her bed I put the neck out. Felt it go...damn it!

So this morning it was off to the chiropractors for an adjustment. No Body Jam class for me tonight...double damn it! I'll just have to be happy with a cardio session and some gentle stretching . The rest of my week sees more sleep (oh! how I love my sleep), a couple of complete rest days with a bowen therapy session thrown in to put my body and muscles into balance again; a
Body Balance class, and some more cardio, and more sleep (hopefully). All in time to start my new program on Monday! Can't wait to start...

My new program includes more advanced weights, and I'll be concentrating on increasing my upper body strength, as well as glute, adductor, hip flexor, and deep abdominal strength. Of course, there's still more body fat to lose, but it won't be at the same rate as the first 12 weeks. I'm definitely aiming for 'BUFF'!
I won't be posting any before & after pics this time round on my blog. Yeah...I know Rachael...I'm a chicken! I want to save the best for last, and I'm hoping my body will be in good enough shape for some professional photos at the end of this round of programs. Then I'll post it on the blog.

Well, the INBA titles were very enjoyable. The girls were a blast! Talk about laugh...I mean you really have to admire the competitors for having the guts to get up there and putting their bodies through all that rigour. But at the same time, you have to see the funny side of body building and some of the egos are definitely bigger than Ben Hur!

What I found fascinating were the 'breast implants'. OMG! One of the female runners-up in the comp had a great body, but all I could look at were those TITS. They defied gravity and personally I think were just a little tooo big for her body. Well, not so big...but how do I explain...really, really round, like separated, perfectly formed balls. Maybe I find it fascinating, because even though I don't have any boobs to boast of, I've never been inclined to try surgery for a better pair. I did ask Carolyn why they insist on having them, and it turns out that they do it to add 'symmetry'.

We really enjoyed the mens division of course. Man... the definition and size in those glutes had Carolyn and I transfixed. Every time they'd 'strike a pose', all we could do was oooh and aaah and sometimes grimace at all the muscles on display. It was really something to see... that separation and to think that those muscles actually exist!

So a fun time was had by all, and I had my 2nd free choice meal of my program...Chicken Parmisagna with salad and chips...yummo! I did struggle with finishing the meal, and it did repeat on me all night, but it was worth it!

Well that's about it for d&m stuff. Not alot of contemplation going on in my head, just alot of thinking about doing not much at all...

Ciao for now...Kerry :)

Thursday, October 16

Sense of Belonging

Why is it when women are approaching 40 and beyond, that they start to re-evaluate their lives? But then again, I suppose we all do when we reach those 'ten year milestones'. You know...when you turn 20 you're no longer a teenager and you're excited about how you're going to make your mark on the world. You think that 40 is OMG...soooo old...and then it's here (almost)...damn...where did those years go?

You still feel like you're 20 years old, but thank god you've been through most of the crap that life is going to deal you, and you don't want to go back there again. You've got the stretch marks, the worry lines, the saggy boobs (for those of us who have them) and all the other baggage that comes with being on this earth that long, but hey...on the inside you still feel like you're 20. You've still got that zest for life and curiosity about the world and you're excited about the future.

Now girls...we just want our bodies to match what we looked like 20 years ago (actually, much better)...that's why I'm in this about you?

So what does that have to do with a sense of belonging?'s part of this 'approaching 40' contemplation on my life up until now. You see...I've never really felt that I've belonged anywhere, even as a child. Why? I didn't find out until I turned 21...but I was adopted at birth. Then the why hit me right between the eyes, and the older I became, the more disconnected I felt, because my parents (adoptive) failed to do one thing. They failed to inform me of my heritage.

My parents told me because they had no choice. It was either tell me, or be told by my biological father, so they chose to do it themselves. I thought that knowing would help, but it didn't. I was different. I looked different. I felt different. I've struggled with this for a long time. Wanting to be different, but wanting to be accepted. I suppose we all want that to a certain degree.

Strangers who had lived in PNG (most Australian ex-pats) would come up to me and tell me all about PNG and start talking to me in pidgin english. Hell...I understood a little of the pidgin english, but I just couldn't relate to their stories because I had no connection to the place I was born.

I left there for Australia when I was 5 years old. Once out of PNG, we no longer spoke pidgin english in our house, nor cantonese (my mother is part chinese). We spoke English (Dad is Australian), even though they could both speak pidgin english. We never mixed with either the PNG or the chinese community. Mum cooked chinese food and a little of her native PNG delicacies.

But we lived an Australian existence. I spoke perfect English, and had no, and still have no connection whatsoever to PNG. And for most of my life I've had that feeling of being...disconnected. Unless you're adopted, I don't think you would understand. But then again, some people feel disconnected for other reasons.

It's taken me this long to feel like I belong...but I don't really belong anywhere. I've spent my entire life yearning for experiences, and I would be just as happy living my life in China, Japan, Europe or wherever. It wouldn't matter. Because I know that wherever I was I would embrace the culture of that country and learn and experience as much as possible in the process.

But I am happy to say that I am content with where I am and who I am for the first time! Doing the IBO program hasn't just been about a physical transformation, it's been a transformation from the inside out (hah! just thought about what you said Rachael in your last email).

I can now confidently say at the ripe young age of 39, that I have arrived...the 2nd stage of my life is just beginning.

Ciao for now...Kerry :)

P.S. I have recently started a quest to locate my biological father. I want to know my heritage for the sake of our daughter, because I don't want her to feel disconnected all her life, and I still want to know where my mother came from, and what was my heritage.
Cliff...if you happen to be reading this (which I doubt)...I am trying to find you (no malice intended)!

Tuesday, October 14

Are you Living your Genius?

I've asked myself this question periodically. Now is one of those times.

The question came from my life coach (Peter) about 5 years or so ago, when I had entered another business venture, and life was hectic and stressful. I'd come to a cross-roads...a fork in the road. Life just wasn't cutting it for me, and I didn't really know anymore what success meant for me. I had been chasing what, at the time I thought was success...being wealthy in my own business. I had been chasing what I'd had years before, when I was 'living my genius', as Peter helped me discover...a huge breakthrough for me at the time.

I, with Peter's help had discovered that when I had my martial arts business/club, that at this period of time, I was actually living my genius! Wow! At the time I didn't know it, and since then had been seeking the lifestyle I enjoyed while at the pinnacle of my health and fitness, as well as the pinnacle of success of my club.

You know...I wasn't making alot of money. But it was enough to do what I wanted and when. During the day I would go to the gym and train; maybe do some more training in the park; do my paperwork and admin stuff for the business; do the shopping, cooking and general household chores; go cycling with my dog or take my dog to the park and play, and prepare my lesson plans to teach that night.

During the nights I would teach martial arts. Weekends were taken up with more teaching, going to tournaments or attending events in which we and our students performed. And then we'd always have a yearly sabbatical and hold a martial arts camp. We had so much fun...especially the kids!

So what was it that I was chasing?...FREEDOM!

Freedom to do what I wanted, when I wanted. Keep fit in the process. To do something different...something unique where I felt like I made a difference in someone's life. Something that would inspire people to become the best they could be and influence their lives in ways they never could imagine.

The best feeling in the world is when you have this person, whether child or adult come through your door. They may not be the most talented, or the most co-ordinated person, and they may not have a lot of self confidence. But they have the right attitude. An attitude of perseverance. It was my job to recognise their strengths, help develop those strengths and bring them to fruition.

And the most rewarding thing for me was to see the change in them...the way they had grown as a person...become better, stronger, more confident. To see their faces light up when they had achieved something significant for them...however seemingly small (gee...sounds alot like raising my Philomena). That is a feeling worth more than any monetary gain or success I could ever achieve, and is something that not everyone has the privilege of experiencing.

So, you see...I was living my genius. And now after many mistakes (no doubt I'll make plenty more), I have come to the realisation that for me, as long as I am being the best person I can be...I'm physically strong, healthy and life is filled with the richness of people, experiences, learnings...and I am doing something which I feel is unique...I am in fact living my genius!

Ciao for today...Kerry :)

Monday, October 13

Helloooo....Reality Check!

Only just today...I got a reality check! It was from my physio.

You see...the last 3 months I've been going great guns. I am so pumped and motivated and I haven't felt this good for about 6 years! I have been getting fitter and stronger and have made alot of gains in not only my weight and fat loss, but also in strength and flexibility.

Here I was being really chuffed with myself, and I decided last week to try a 20-minute jog on the treadmill. I started fairly well, and upped the speed cause I wasn't feeling anything aerobically. Now I was really careful to make sure I had the right form, and felt pretty good. I felt a little niggle in the right hip after about 10 minutes, but pushed on for another 10 minutes. Well, you know how I said I was stiff after that? I was stiff for about 3-4 days afterwards, and I'm still feeling just a little sore. Naughty girl...

Anyway...I decided to phone my physio and relay this experience, because I was reading something in the Sunday Mail which sounded like what I was experiencing, and the word 'osteoarthritis' was dropped. Well, didn't I panic...Me?...I couldn't possibly have that. I mean...I've played sport all my life, and it's only been the last 6 years that I haven't been so active. And I eat pretty good most of the time. Things like that don't happen to me...I'm (once again becoming) bullet-proof don't you know?

Luckily, he put me at ease, and asked..."Kerry - when was the last time you jogged?". To which I replied "oh about 5 years". "Hmmm..." he said. "And tell me", he continued, "How long did it take you to reach peak physical condition when you started martial arts", he asked. "Oh, about 6 years, training 2-3 hrs a day, 6 days a week", I replied.

Well, venture to say, there was silence on the phone as I pondered exactly what he had just said. And the penny dropped, and he continued..."the most common problem with people who are starting a training program, or should I say, re-starting a training program (ah..hem..I think he meant muua...), is that they have the memory of what they 'used to be able to do' and do too much too soon. Take it easy. You will get there." End of quote...end of lesson...

Patience is not one of my virtues, but I knew what he was talking about, as he reminded me about the time when I paid a personal trainer to get back into shape and I injured myself because I was hell bent on pushing myself to the limit! Hey...that's all I knew. That's how I always trained. Stupid!

But I don't want to go back to being a fat, unfit, dibilitated slob whose self confidence was at an all-time low and who could only see a futile future with increased health problems, complete dibilitation, and as a failed role model for my little girl. it's back to the drawing board. Feet firmly on the ground...check...reality...check...patience has now been restored!

Ciao for today...Kerry :)

Friday, October 10

Re-Prioritising my Life

I was reading a thread on the IBO forum last night, and one of the sunshine coast girls was offloading about how everything seemed to fall to the wayside on this program. That once you take care of everyone else's needs along with eating right and exercising, there's just no time for...CLEANING! Well...she had got to the stage where enough was enough and she had to clean for a few days and put aside everything and everyone else, just so she could feel on top of things again.

I could really empathise with her...I too am experiencing the same dilemna. Since starting the program, some things I've let slip, and one of those is, you guessed it...housework! The other thing is my website (home selling) and general paperwork and households bills, budgeting, etc.

Normally, I would be so organised with these things and know exactly when bills were due, how much money there was for food and so on. But at the moment I'm not really too sure when some bills are due. I've been a bit slack in that department, whereas I usually have a reminder in my outlook to tell me when bills are due. They do get paid, though I got our phone bill the other day, and realised it was two months worth...oops! I really need to have one day to clean the house from top to bottom, and then one day to go through all the mail, and bills that have been piling up!

I also need to re-prioritise what's now important in my life now...because it's changed. My first priority is always Philomena, though I hate to admit...I've been neglecting her a little recently because I've been so caught up in myself and my health and fitness goals. The guilt is starting to rear its' ugly head...arghhhh...

I reach this point sometimes, and I know it's happening...when I start to live my life in the realm of imagination, and it starts to encroach upon my everyday reality. For me, it's a warning sign, because that means my head is in the clouds and my feet have left the ground...

Reality starts to take a back seat, and normal, everyday things begin to get ignored or put off (like keeping the kitchen clean, changing Phil's nappies a bit more regularly, folding the clothes & towels, making the beds, cleaning the toilet and bathroom, general tidying, etc).

This week I have reached that point, and I need to re-prioritise and re-organise my life. Get back on track and do the simple things that will have a (negative) effect on other areas of my life if left to chance. And I need to get back to writing up a daily and weekly 'to-do' list, so that the 'other stuff' in my life doesn't overwhelm me, and my husband doesn't decide to leave me because I've been a neglectful, lazy, selfish wife and mother! I've been putting off what I know I need to do all week...
procrastination is definitely one of my weaknesses.

On the health front's all great!

Tomorrow sees my weekly weigh-in for the end of week 11, which means the INBA titles are next weekend, and I am so looking forward to meeting Sue and Carolyn and other members of IBO. It will also be great to see what standards I can aspire toward...a great motivator!

Ciao for's hoping that my feet touch the ground very soon...Kerry :)

Thursday, October 9

Focus or Self Obsession?

You know...since starting on this journey to a better body, better me, I've noticed something...I keep checking myself out to see if there's less fat here and more muscle there...are those dimples smoothing out?...does my butt look big in this?..blah..blah..blah...

And you know what?'s bloody time-consuming!

And it's not just's stuff like being aware of every moment of the day, because I'm either prepping food, cooking food, eating food, then I'm writing it all down. Every time I drink a 500ml glass of water, I strike it off on my little blackboard, so I know I'm drinking my min. 3ltrs per day. Now when I shower, I do a dry skin brush, followed by exfoliating in the shower, and then moisturise when I get out...and of course there's my hair. I have to wash & condition every day plus comb it in the shower, otherwise I get dreds in about 2 days.

Then it's making sure my gym clothes are washed and ready-to-wear so I can zip out the door. It's writing and replying to my email buddies, reading the forum, responding, updating this blog (and it's only been days since I started it). I now have to think about what I am wearing before I go out, because I am so conscious of wanting to 'look good'. Does that sound familiar to anybody?

Prior to this, my showers took 5 minutes. I don't wear make up generally so that saves on time. I don't brush my hair all day, or have to blow-dry. It's done when I get out and put stuff in it, and that's it. I don't do washing, toning, cleansing for the face, or do my nails. I didn't care if I looked daggy when I went out, because it was too much trouble and I was fat anyway, so why bother?

So I was wondering about that today. Am I becoming self-obsessed or is it because I'm just so focused on reaching my goals?

Then I think about how far I've come, with losing weight and body fat, fitting into my clothes. My energy levels have gone through the roof because I'm exercising and eating properly. My confidence has grown again. I feel good about myself for the first time in a long time. Even my self-talk and how I am now responding to people has changed. And the flow-on effect is now that the way other people are responding to me has changed. I'm connecting so much more with people now and attracting more positivity in my life. My opportunities and options seem to be increasing and I have a new, more profound outlook on my life and what my future holds!

So I think about what Shelly (my feedback coach) often says to me in her replies..."It's all good!"

On another note...the cardiologist appointment for Philomena went well. As I thought, she was really good and no problem this time, because she's one year older. She actually had fun (except for the ECG). And the best part heart problems! Just a little 'flow murmur', but the little holes in her heart she had at birth are all closed up. So no more visits to cardiologists...yay! went well last night, though the legs were a little fatigued after doing a legs workout. It's usually that way for about the first 10min's or so, and then the fatigue disappears and I'm ready to get into the remainder of my cardio. I was wondering how I'm going to go in my next program. I'm assuming that my training program may involve some heavier weights work, so I wonder how doing cardio afterwards is going to work. I will just have to wait and see and cross that bridge when I get to it.

Today, the hips/glutes are still a little stiff, but good, and the legs workout last night helped loosen the stiffness a little too. I did go a bit lighter on the stretches and omitted my glute exercises that my physio gave me. The rest did me good, so hopefully it will ease up towards the end of the week...week 11 of my program...yikes! Only 1 week to go til I finish...though I am looking forward to having a week off weights and having a change to my exercise for my 2nd program.

That's it for today I suppose. Better go and earn my keep and get lunch ready for Philomena and I!

Ciao for now...Kerry :)

Wednesday, October 8

Re-inventing Myself

Better sleep last night. Philomena slept through til about 2am, so I only had one interruption during the night. Though I did wake up a little stiff...

Last night's program was 60min's cardio, abs & stretching to finish. I mixed up the cardio a little. 20min treadclimber; 20min x-trainer and 20min jog on treadmill. I haven't jogged for so long. Gosh it felt great!

Thought I'd try it to see how my back and hips would hold up. Well, the back no problems, and aerobically I found it surprisingly easy, so I upped the speed. The hip? Well the niggle started about 10 minutes into the jog, but I pushed it and concentrated on placing my feet heel first to toe and keeping my hips straight ahead and my posture straight, but relaxed. I should have stopped at 10 minutes. My hips stiffened up, and when I got home I was walking funny. I had to apply the nurofen gel before bed. Still a little stiff this morning, but not so bad. The positive out of all this is that I know I can jog and even though I was stiff, I had no pain! I'll just cut back to 10min's once a week and gradually build on that.

So tonight it's legs/arms & 45min cardio and I always finish my workouts with a complete stretch. My hips should loosen up today through's hoping anyway...I can't miss a workout! Oh no...definitely not! Though I am thinking of Carolyn's forum thread, "What would Buffy do?", and try not to get too hung up about it if I need to change my program around to rest up the hip (Kerry, don't be a wuss! Unless you're in pain...workout!)

Well I've taken my first step in my re-invention...actually... starting the IBO program was the first step...this is the next step. I rang ADF (Australian Defence Force), after reading a bit more about entry requirements on the site. I spoke to this lovely woman who was so helpful. Anyway, I'm waiting for a call back to tell me about their next information day. I'll go and check it out and talk to them to get a feel for if it's right for me.

I rang my physio too, and told him about my plans. I wanted his medical opinion about my back and muscular imbalances, because he's treated me all the way through my initial back injury and subsequent muscular problems. I didn't want to pursue something which realistically wasn't going to happen. Well what a surprise when he said he didn't think that would be a problem. He said if I continued with my current program along with his exercises, then he thinks I could do it in 6 months! Wow! What a shock. He was just so supportive and encouraging. And if I'm not looking to try entry for another 12 months, he thinks I'll breeze it in...yay!

Needless to say, my mind was running all soughts of scenarios...last night at the gym I was jogging in a tight white t-shirt with those army pants/fatigues and looking rather sweaty, muscly and athletic (in my head of course!) I've attached a photo at the start of this blog entry, of the look I want and will have. The photo above came to me compliments of Joanne (thanks Joanne), another member of IBO (idealbodiesonline).

Okay, time for me to go! Feeling great again today (apart from stiff hip). Gotta clean, shower, play with Phil for a little while and get her ready. Got a hospital appointment with the cardiologist. Nothing major - a slight murmur picked up at birth. Couldn't do ECG or other stuff last year, because Philomena freaked out and I didn't want to sedate her to take the tests. Doctor wasn't concerned and so hopefully being 2.5yrs old, she'll be more settled today. I'll have to work out how I attach more photos so you can see Philomena...she is beautiful! Daddy's good dark, looks and the longest die for! So jealous of her eyelashes...

Ciao for now...Kerry :)

Tuesday, October 7

A little washed out

Yes...I awoke feeling a little 'hung over' this morning, but no boast of any alcohol consumption. I did weights/cardio last night after a two day break, probably only my 2nd two day break in my program so far. I trained hard as I always do and upped the weights on a couple which I was finding a little too easy. I didn't get out of bed until 7:30 this morning, and Philomena had to amuse herself after Anthony had left for work. Luckily, I don't have a job! Otherwise I'd be stuffed. I don't really get a rest with a toddler running around (and me after her), but at least I don't have any other demands or time constraints, and for that, I am thankful. As long as I have Philomena bathed, fed and ready for bed when Anthony gets home, I'm out the door and on my way to the gym.

I think I'm the gym, that is. I feel strange if I don't go to the gym. I feel so good when I go and I love that feeling of being in control physically again, being focused and pushing's been a long time since I've had that feeling, and I'd forgotten the adrenaline rush that comes with it. I always keep in the forefront of my mind not only how I'll be looking (which is muscular, strong and lean), but what I'll be doing and how I feel while I'm doing it. I also imagine myself training in martial arts again and I can't wait to get to that level of fitness and strength again. It's such a motivator for me!

I'm going to try a class in my week's break from the program. You know that one, I think is called 'Body Combat'. My physio has given me some isolation exercises to help increase my glute strength which is sadly lacking, and which I need for maintaining my stances and high kicking positions. It's just to sound out my progress and for a little fun and bit of motivation. So, with the exercises and continuing with my IBO program I should be able to start some basic martial arts training for myself again, soon. Fingers crossed...

I just have to share this one...I have with my IBO email buddies...

During my stretching routine at the end of my gym session, Alby (who is the gym guy who does my caliper, etc), came up to me and said "Do you know you have a nickname?". Of course I replied, "no...I have a nickname?" looking dumbfounded. I have a nickname at the gym and it is 'Superwoman'! Well I had to laugh at this one, because all I could think of is..."if they think I'm training hard now, wait til I'm really doing some serious training! What will they call me then?"

It was quite hard then to maintain my usual serious, focused demeanour and I had to try hard to keep the smile off my face, which lasted all the way home (with some sporadic heckling in-between) until I could tell Anthony.

Well that's it for me today...been thinking more about the army reserves, and I'm quite liking the idea. I'm going to make it a 2yr goal and get as fit as I can until then and brush up on all my other skills too. Who knows what will happen in-between, but I know I'm going to enjoy the journey, wherever it takes me!

Monday, October 6

Why a Blog? Why now?

Why on earth do I want to start a blog? It's the start of a new journey for me. It began 10 weeks ago, and it started with ''. It was a decision to stop feeling like crap, to lose weight, get fit again, and be the person I used to be. I wanted the person I see in the mirror to look like the person I see in my head (which is what I was), only better...much better...

Life's gone a bit awry since hurting my back, after initially decreasing my activity levels after a lifetime of sport and being fit and healthy. Problem is, once you injure yourself you don't realise how it has a cumulative effect, and before long, other parts of your body break-down. It affects your health, your quality of life, and...your self confidence.

Anyway, I decided to start today of all days, because for the first time in a long time, I'm imagining so many possibilities. I've been thinking of how to re-invent myself, and now there is so much to choose from. What should I do, and which new path shall I take?

It's been changing daily. All I am thinking of at the moment with my program is to get my body fat % down to where I have smooth, hard muscles showing. The bonus with all of this is that I am gradually healing my injuries and getting stronger. What a great feeling! The possibilities I know will keep expanding as I get leaner, stronger, what a trip! Who needs drugs to get a high!

What have I been thinking of doing? Getting back to my favoured sport (another 6-12months). Doing stuff I've always wanted to do, but didn't think in my previous condition would come to fruition any time soon...rockclimbing, kayaking, back to bushwalking, surfing...the list goes on.

And last night, a real aha! reserves part-time! Wow...I thought about that earlier in life but took a different path. It's really a 2 year goal. Hope I'm not too old by the time I'm ready. I do have a toddler to think about...oh and a husband! He thinks it's a great goal and the extra money would be welcomed (we live on 1 income, and the idea of going back to work in a 'normal' job just doesn't excite me). It's not only the physical part of it, but the discipline, the combat/weapons skills you learn, and of course, doing something for your country. Just giving back something for a change.

So there it is...I'm hoping by putting it out there into the universe, the answers will come to me and the right doors will open to me...

I'm also hoping to put to rest ghosts of the past which still haunt me and hold me back from reaching my full potential.

Ciao for my new, emerging, skin...Kerry :)

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