Yes...you probably guessed it, going by the image! Today has been so far, one of those days. The worst part about the frustration I am feeling, is that the reasons are not self-induced, i.e. they do not stem from something I've failed to do. I've put in everything I have. It's frustration due to things that are no longer in my control, and the parties who do have control on the end result, are too numerous to guarantee 100% compliance.
What am I talking about? What else?...my army reserve application.
Now, technically, nothing is wrong. All my tests and reports last week were all thumbs up. But that was all verbal, and until all my reports are actually received by the Defence Force and the doctors have had time to review the results...well, I can't proceed to the next step, which is my pre-enlistment fitness test.
I rang the EN&T specialist today, because they didn't call me back on Friday with my final balance test results. I gave specific instructions to URGENTLY fax off the results and report to the Defence Force, and this morning I rang to find the bloody specialist has gone on leave...grrrr.... The receptionist did tell me all the results were 'normal' and that would it make any difference if she faxed off the results directly? I just said "I hope so". But being as anal as the Defence Force are, that probably won't be good enough, and they'll need a detailed report from the specialist himself. He's not back until Tuesday next week!! Of course, they failed to tell me that on Friday (that he was going on leave). I rang my contact in the DF, to advise her the results were being faxed through. She just said it would take a couple of days for the doctors to review the reports and if there was anything else they needed they would let me know! Anything else? F*%K ME...what the hell else do they want?...my heart on a platter?...grrrrr....
Sorry...it's not often I feel like this, but when I do, I really just need to vent. I know I'll feel much better tonight after my workout, where I can train out my frustrations in the gym.
I was so bloody sore on Sunday, I didn't end up doing anything, as my body really needed to recuperate. I know I shouldn't have done a Superset session after my powercircuit, but I'd missed a couple of days during the week, and didn't want to miss anymore. Anyway...I just did a cardio session last night, and will hit the weights again tonight. I'm still a little sore in the chest, and my traps are as tight as hell, but hopefully tonight's workout and stretching will help alleviate the tightness. I might have to go a bit lighter on the bench press too, or skip it altogether. Another couple of days should see the chest DOMS disappear altogether.
Well...now that I've got that off my chest, I'm feeling slightly better. When it all comes down to it - looking at the bigger picture and being totally honest with myself...it's not that I haven't succeeded in my application. It's the possibility that I won't succeed due to something so incomprehensively minute, as to disregard all other facets and areas of my application...that is...small picture thinking and beauracratic BS! I feel like a Telstra customer...as a recent ex-Telstra customer intimated on talkback radio last week, "Telstra has the ability to turn a quite sane person into a RAVING PSYCHOPATH!"....or words to that effect.
And while I'm being honest with myself (and you)...I must admit that I have not planned anything else. I have planned to succeed, and have convinced myself that this a given (the army reserves). I can't stand the thought of the possibility that I may have to go back and work in a bank...that would be absolutely soul-destroying for me, with the word MEDIOCRITY coming to mind.
I've made alot of plans, based on the this premise, and I haven't formulated a PLAN B. Oh well...there's just no time for 'stinkin-thinkin', so I just need to focus on PLAN A and expect the best. Whatever else happens, I will just need to deal with it as it comes.
Come on gym time!...a bit of pushing and grunting is in order, me thinks.
3 comments:
Patience m'dear. I know the waiting around is (obviously) a big struggle. I have no doubt that you're gonna be an army chick :)
A wise person once said, 'it won't happen overnight but it will happen'....ok, so it was Rachel Hunter in a Pantene ad but still, you get the gist! Hang in there, have a cup of tea & soon all this crappy waiting will be over. Man, don't know if I want to follow your footsteps! I didn't know it was such a long stressful (& expensive) process - good to know!
xxx
Thanks guys. I'm feeling pretty good again, as I thought I would. I've just returned from the gym, and feeling more patient. Yeah, I know I just have to wait. It's just some days (like today), the waiting takes its' toll. MM, it may not be as expensive for you. I didn't think I had much wrong with me, but the DF are very picky. Depends on how you complete your Medical questionnaire. It's about a 10-page novel! If you don't think there's anything serious health-wise that would affect your ability to perform your duties, then don't put it down!
Post a Comment