Feeling 'Meh' & Outer Personality

Thanks for your comments and words of support. They really mean alot to me. It's definitely different here in blogland. You can say whatever you want without fear of judgement.

I am feeling better today. Just a little numb. I'm standing at the crossroads. My first Crossfit session is tomorrow night; I've put off my martial arts training session until Saturday or Monday (I needed to be here last night); and I leave in Kapooka in 16 days. Things were pretty rosy until yesterday when the shit hit the fan the previous night. Now I have a husband who needs me right now, and it's kind of thrown me. I'm just going with the flow and I'll allow AW to come along at his own pace. For now, I'm just keeping a low profile and doing what I need to do. I haven't put aside my own needs totally though, and will continue to push through with my fitness plans and goals. I need to keep on track with this leading up to Kapooka, so it's important I stay focused.

My weekend soldiering was more physical than I thought it would be. There was alot of walking, and scrambling over a whole day and into the night. I quite enjoyed it, until I had to lead for the night navigating. I found this quite daunting. It's quite scary when you can't see anything in the dark. I was afraid I was going to fall into a hole (and there were plenty around), or step on a snake or small animal. And navigating through lantana is hard going. But I pushed through my fear and we made it back to camp. Upon our return to Enoggera on Sunday, we had to sit a theory exam on navigating, which I passed, and spent the rest of a long hot day unloading trucks and washing and cleaning camo tents and tarpaulins, and generally lifting heavy shit. All in all, I enjoyed the weekend, but couldn't wait to get home and have a shower. Boy, was I rife! Mind you, I hadn't showered since Friday, and with all that sweating, well, you can imagine how good I smelt (NOT)!

Last Friday morning, which was my last gym training session, I took the opportunity to do a beep test, and was dreading doing it, since it had been a long time. I was pleasantly surprised to find that level 7.5 was quite comfortable! So I just need to maintain this until Kapooka.

Now continuing on with the numerology stuff... Outer Personality...the person you want others to see you as, and not necessarily who you are. It is the image we present and what is expected of us because of the 'face' we put on.

"This person will present themselves as a leader, very independent and capable. Underneath they may not be too sure of what they are doing but because of the image they present, a lot will be expected of them. They are full of new ideas and plans for those around them. Responsibility is a part the plan in their every day life when they many not want that at all.

They appear to be aggressive and dominant whilst this is the image they present to cover for any uncertainties.

They dress well and like to be the first in fashion. They like to look unique and unusual."

Well...the only thing I don't agree on is being the first in fashion.

Again, thanks everyone for your words of support. I'm still not up to reading all blogs or leaving comments. I'll get around to it when I'm feeling a little less numb.

Ciao for now...Kerry :-)